Playing the waiting game ...

It's the end of the two week wait (2WW). I tested and it was negative. Yesterday, I spotted. So it was either premenstrual spotting or implantation bleeding (and because I just had implantation, no hcg, which the test measures, has been made yet in enough quantity to show). SO ... I know they call the 2WW all kids of names, but it is this time, between symptoms of either/or and no menstrual cycle which is a killer. I've had weird "symptoms", which could be or could not be, for a week now. Nipples on full alert at all times since last Friday (we're talking a week of gasping as I take off my pajama top), aching breasts, and now this spotting ... the problem is that since I took Ovidrel, hey, it COULD be that! However, I tested with the nipply sensation, since I wanted to see if the Ovidrel hcg was still in my system and I got a negative, so it looks like my body gets rid of hcg quickly. No false positives to be had.

All right, I dub this time period the three day Hades, or 3DH. I have to wait 3 days for enough hcg to build to test positive or I will have a full cycle.

The good news is that my cycles only last a day or two. :) I know, millions of women would hate me if they knew. My cycles are LIGHT, SHORT, and have only about 4 hours of cramps and very few PMS symptoms (just tiredness the day before). And then I guess it'll be onto the itchy Femara again. I was really getting excited because I hadn't scratched my scalp to pieces in over a week ... no random itches, no flaming hives, it was heaven. Of course, I did have hives a lot this week, but they were weird hives. I got a swollen lip Sunday (hey, I drank lemonade so I was kind of asking for it). Another swollen lip Monday. And another swollen lip Tuesday (each day the swelling was in a different place and it was not bad enough to warrant a Benadryl). Then a swollen top eyelid Thursday night. Last night, on the other eye, that triangle at the center against the nose swelled. I had no idea that part could swell up like a balloon like that. :) I'm thinking there may have been lemon juice on the shrimp I peeled and ate, so then when I rubbed my eye driving, up it went. So, like I said, no flaming hives, but a lot of weird hives.

And that tells me my body is on full alert for imposters. I reacted for months on the Femara, reacted strongly to the sperm this time (all those cramps and then feeling poorly afterwards), and then I swelled close to each day for a week. I'm just sitting here wondering if I am one of those women who have that autoimmune response too much for implantation. How does one find out? Grrrr.... my worries will be over (but a whole host of others will come) if only during this 3DH I get a positive. THEN, I will know.

Of course, I would still worry about a miscarriage. The autoimmune factor is huge with me. And by me having two autoimmune diseases (Grave's and Hashimoto's), allergies to drugs and lemons, and a full alert hive attack brought on by Femara, I'm at awful risk of miscarriage provided I can even get there and the embryo isn't killed upon implantation. Oh the worries ... darned 3DH. Well, I have enough to keep occupied over these 3 days. :)