I got a barely-there positive on the home pregnancy test this morning. Good. My joy has been moderated by the fact that this is what happened last time, and it didn't make it. (I am awfully good at killing embryos.) I've called the office to go in for my first HCG test. I already know the number is around 18, since the HPT showed that barely-there line. But, on the plus side, if I get a, HCG level, and I still lose it, I have some proof for the recurrent pregnancy loss investigation. The doc just insists in 3 documented losses before he acknowledges there is a problem.
So, is this the point where I pray I don't get the 40% likelihood of a miscarriage? And cross my fingers? It's only CD 10, maybe it's just a very light pregnancy line? Yeah, that's what I told myself last time.
I'm not sure if I should be happy ... I'm just waiting for that other shoe to fall right now.
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